Building humor. With explanation :)

• Ceremonial laying of a symbolic brick. Your attention, dear readers, I want to focus not on the official who lays the brick. It would be foolish to laugh at her sloppy work. After all, she's not a builder! So ... I took a picture as a keepsake ... Of course, she does not know how to lay bricks beautifully. It's none of her business...
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And I want to draw your attention to the rest of the masonry. This is something real builders did! And how do they differ from the official in terms of skill?

• Remember the words of Captain Vrungel from the cartoon? When did he lecture his assistant Lom about the correct name of the ship?

You need to be very careful about how your company is called: how the name declines, how the abbreviation sounds. Otherwise, something like this could happen.

And how to participate in tenders with such a name?

"Hello, I'm the director of ISIS?"

Just in case, observing the Law, I must now say that: “ISIS is a terrorist organization banned in Russia”

• A lot has already been said about ramps. Often they are made only for show: “Here! We have done! We are great, we take care of the disabled and mothers with prams!”

But in reality ... Who will be responsible when the stroller falls into this hole?

• What suspicious and superstitious builders are sometimes! In some countries, there is no 13th floor. Entering the elevator, you will not find the buttons with the number 13.

Immediately after the 12th, there is the 14th floor. Don't believe?

How do you like this arrangement? Even during construction, instead of the 13th floor, they invented the 12th + 1st floor. Is that what they call it among themselves?

• And try to say that the street is not lit!

There is a pole! Eat!

Is the lamp hanging? hanging!

Is the light bulb on? Burning!

Well, the fact that he is looking at the sky ... So it must be so! The main thing is to correctly explain that this was intended and that someone needs it!

• In our time, to cut down a tree, you need to collect so many documents ... Ecologists will not allow a branch to be cut down, without good reason.

Well, the fact that you decided to build a garage here ... Go around as you like, but do not touch the tree!

By the way, there was such a case in the 90s:

One of my friends caught fire to buy the 21st "Volga". Long sought to be in perfect condition. Found. According to the announcement at the bus stop. The owner claimed that the car was in perfect condition, the mileage was about 1000 km. How can this be? The car is over 30 years old, and the mileage is so low!

Comes. Private sector. The owner is a grandfather, about 80 years old. They go to the garage. And then ... my friend oh ... was surprised in general. A pear tree is growing in front of the garage door! Literally a meter from the gate, exactly in the center!!!

How so? How did the car get into the garage?

It turned out that my grandfather worked all his life as some kind of official in the city administration. In accordance with the position, he was provided with a company car with a driver. Where you need to go - the driver is always in the wings. In the late 60s, he bought this Volga. Got rights. Everything was going to learn how to ride it … Yes, and was not going to. Here's the car and stood in the garage all these years.

Where did the mileage come from then? Once I went to the sea with my family. But behind the wheel was still the same full-time driver.

What's with the pear? Grandfather asked me to come up with something so that the pear would remain ... And what can you think of? I had to clean up.

• Design geniuses!

Well, they couldn’t put the toilet in another place ... But hanging the hinges on the other side of the door would probably be easier!

Since it happened so, then on this window in the door, you still need to make a window - to close it while visiting the latrine!

• The photo was taken at one of the construction sites in China. Smart welder! And what to do... the competition among the workers is great.

Try telling your boss you can't work because there's no welding shield!

He will immediately find a replacement for you - someone who can.

• It seems that someone took the fairy tale about Emelya, heard in childhood, too seriously!

I took the stove ride as a life hack!

Although ... It's funny to us, but a person has a mobile stove. If only the traffic police did not see the moment of transportation. There are no numbers!

Can you imagine what he will have to write in the protocol?

The authorities will have doubts about the adequacy of their employee.