The wife asks her husband:
-Vanya, what gift would you like for your birthday?
- Bulgarian.
“Are you totally freaked out!?” Russian is now not satisfied???
Petrovich almost landed in prison for the slave trade, after he placed an ad in the local newspaper: "I will sell the old grinder"
Mom sent Little Red Riding Hood to Grandma ... Little Red Riding Hood jumped on a scooter and rolled through the forest.
Here comes the Wolf. He took the scooter, against the tree ... khryas! And the scooter broke.
Here is a bear:
- What are you gray disgraceful? Why are you scared baby!? Come on, let's repair the scooter!
There is nothing to do ... He grabbed the wreckage and went to the service station to the moose.
- Moose, help me! I screwed up a little here... podstab the frame of the scooter.
Sorry bro, I'm busy.
- There, in the corner there is a welding machine, there are electrodes in the same place. Cook it yourself.
Well, the wolf in a smart way and cooked Shapkino a vehicle.
He gave it to the girl, and he himself ran forward along the path in order to intercept the Cap again. Where there is no bear.
It means that the Hat is moving on. Here again the wolf flies out. Such a furious one! He takes the scooter from her and again hits the tree, hitting, hitting, hitting! He turns his head, and then the bear, leaning on a birch, says:
Well, you know what to do!
The wolf again to the elk, again he brewed everything that broke. I gave the scooter to Little Red Riding Hood and ran to the grandmother.
The hat comes to the grandmother:
- Grandmother, grandmother! Why are your eyes so red?
- From welding, b ... !!!
History from life:
The head of the department gives a lecture. Theme: "Work at height". At the end of the lecture he asks the students:
So, you are a foreman. You have an emergency. A worker fell from the 5th floor. What will you do first?
Students remember all the ways to provide "First Aid", someone suggested calling an ambulance, someone the police ...
To all these answers, the teacher shakes his head in the negative. Finally he says:
- He needs to wear a safety belt and a helmet!
At the construction site, high authorities from the mayor's office are waiting. The foreman instructs the hard workers how to behave, what can and cannot be said. Instead of a mat, he recommended using the words: “You are wrong.”
And now, the delegation is on the construction site... The people around are working with tripled energy.
At the top, welders are welding ... One of the welders ran out of electrode in the holder. He mechanically removes the stub of the electrode and throws it down. And it’s necessary for this to happen - he falls by the collar of the foreman, who gave instructions in the morning.
A second hitch ... And the foreman at the top of his voice:
- Semmmyonych ... you are not right, s ...! And your mother... wow how wrong!
Nothing can interfere with a real high-altitude climber if he decides to take a nap.
- Seryoga, don't be afraid! I calculated everything!
- Well, you would have climbed instead of me!
- No, no, I can't. I'm a doctor. Who will give you first aid?
Jokes aside! Megacreative guys are working!
Well it was necessary to think of this before! How they accelerated the process of unloading the machine with building materials!
Just take and lift the whole truck to the level of the third floor!!! Shine!
Dear parents!
Listen to the desire of your child, after graduation, choose the profession that he wants!!!
After all, he will be drawn to his beloved work all his life.
Well, the guy wanted to go to the circus school! I wanted to be an acrobat!
No! “Go to the builders ... You will always have money ...”